Beging 2019. In deze tweede ochtend van het jaar, toen ik nog donker en rustig was in huis, heb ik eindelijk de tekst van mijn eerste post in het engels vertaald. Dat dit het begin van een vruchtbare jaar mag zijn.

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“De blije taart” (translated: “the joyful pie”) was born 2 years ago in a special moment of my life. At that time something happend that allowed me to feel aal the love of my parents. An unconditional and endless love. I already wrote about it in my blog bye-bye salsiccia (bye-bye sausage!). An old conflict seemed to be solved in my favour and I was proud and incredibly happy. However, the reality has turned out differently. Still from this experience I learned that my value doesn’t depend on the approval of my parents but on myself. I am valuable for the simple fact that “I AM” and not because other people love me. We are love in the first place and that is what we have to find in ourselves. The power to survive comes from within and not from outside. It is a complicated story, but also very interesting …

I want to connect this story to the ownership of the recipe. Does this recipe belong to me? YES, of course, I made it up, that morning, just like that. NO, because the recipe is the product of a number of circumstances that are connected with a wire to each other. This cake is a healthier version of the apple pie that I baked 5 years ago for the surgeon who had removed my breast and armpit glands. Without Oma’s apple pie, there would be no joyful pie. Even without all the misery I experienced, there would be no joyful pie.

Since 5 years I am very aware of the fact that our life can end very quickly, just like that. Sometimes I think: what am I going to do with my culinary legacy if I would be in the situation to leave quickly. It has nothing to do with the fact that I am afraid to be forgotten. It is about wanting to finish what I started, because I know it is valuable. Still, I am beginning to give less and less importance to this issue. I have become aware of the fact that what I started, did not actually start with me. It is the product of multiple experiences that probably started before I was born. I know that if I die, what I AM will not die with me. It will still live in the people who love me and who are close to me because every action we do is like a seed that can root when it encounters the right environment.

I sow this seed here in the hope that it will give good fruits.